Unfortunately, this can be all to true
when dealing with others whom have experienced past hurts, betrayals,
disappointments, etc. When someone is unwilling to seek help, or unaware they
need it; past hurts can seriously impact present and/or future situations and
relationships (personal and professional). No doubt, we’ve all experienced
hurts throughout our lives in many forms and in different circumstances. Bad
relationships of any kind and misuse of our trust have become common place in
our society. However, it is those of us which choose to ignore the scars
or results of those troubles which most often go on to continue a viscous cycle
of hurting others because of it. Being aware of your unhealed emotional,
mental, and/or spiritual scars is a crucial step to moving forward and
providing the footing for healing.
If you find
yourself dwelling on past troubles, reliving old hurts, mistreating others,
struggling to trust, or afraid to take risks based on previous experiences the
chances are you’ve not healed from preceding life happenings. Whether it
is intentional or unintentional . . . hurt people, hurt people. It has
become more and more prevalent in society; the results of undiagnosed/untreated
pain and its mutilations. Don’t become a part of the problem when the solution
is simple . . . self-care. So how does one obtain self-care? By first
recognizing there may be a problem, connecting to a support group of people
whom have successfully lived through similar experiences, or reaching out to
locate a counselor to discuss emotional or mental concerns, or by bonding with
those in whatever your faith system offers in the way of healing.
The goal is to
become whole again and end the painful rotation of unhealed sorrows. Taking the
time to rebuild oneself through accessing healthy means of expression can only
result in the transition from a stuck place to one of unstuck and regaining
one’s functionality. Not to mention, regaining a healthy outlook in
emotional/mental areas of your life ultimately can help to end repetitive
cycles thus improving one’s life overall. The reality is no one really
wants to be the bad guy or the person accused of hurting another human being
they care for . . . if you do, that’s quite another kettle of fish in it of
itself.
Living a life
filled with joy and purpose doesn’t have to be difficult as long as we are
willing to do the hard work of self-improvement on a regular basis. I am aware
this can be easier said than done; however, a journey begins with a single step.
Why not make yours towards restorative progress and life enhancement . . .
shall we?
6 comments:
I really needed 2 read this. I don't know how 2 forgive myself for the pain and hurt I did to friends.but the hurt and pain he put me thru I will never forget,that's why I had to let my relationship go cause it was like he wanted me to be stuck in 1 place. How do I just let go.KB
This is a good observation on how if you have been in some bad situations where you have been hurt that you will think everyone is this way. Which of course is not true everyone is not the same. But alot of people do not see it that way when they have been played and hurt so hard it is hard for them to give there heart away again because they defently do not want to feel the pain again. Which would also lead to people to stay in the same abusive relationship, because they rather deal with the old pain then verses try and find someone eals who might do the same. I think people need to do a little soul searching when they leave a relationship and go and seek help and support groups to learn how to deal with getting your selfesteem back up and to learn how to trust again. good piece keep on writing really enjoyed it
KB, letting go is never an easy task, it can sometimes be the hardest thing we ever do. Because it means we have no safety net to fall back on if we let go and fall. That is where faith comes into play in a big way. 1st you have to know what you did was the right thing to do. 2nd, you have to have to have faith in what you hoped for however, not seen yet. And 3rd, you have to trust the process! What you're holding on to is not your relationship. Its the HOPE of what your wished it would have turned into or could have been. Allow yourself the time to grieve and heal. Talk someone if need be about how you feel and what you want from your life now. This journey won't be an easy one however, it won't be as hard as all the pain you've endured thus far. Good journey, I support you!!
When your life is filled with disappointment and let downs & you have been hurt so much, it's hard to identify the source.
A lot of times, the source is yourself and instead of trying to get over what others have done to me, I have to acknowledge all that I have dished out & I really had to quit looking for solid relations in crumbling places once I realized where I was going wrong, because I accepted shady acquaintances over positive ones simply because I was shady myself...that might be going into a whole new topic though.
Venaye Davis, exactly!! Sometimes the origin or source of our pain has more to do with us than with others. Doing the work to identify the source of that pain is difficult for many. I love your comment!! Self-inventory is a necessary part of growth and healing. Before you point a finger at anyone start by looking at self first. Thanks for sharing!
Right! What good are pointed fingers when the ones pointing are just as dirty..?
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